Fic: Seen It All
Sep. 5th, 2012 10:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wyndewalkerTitle: Seen It All
Author: Wyndewalker
Xover Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Series: Karaoke
Summary : Lorne thinks he's seen it all. Then Thor walks onto his stage.
Challenge: twistedshorts August-Fic-A-Day
Authors note:
Rating: PG
Word Count: 823 according to Word
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Stargate SG-1 or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. All rights belong to their owners and I merely borrow the characters for your amusement.
After almost five years of running Caritas, Lorne had developed something of a blase, seen it all, nothing could possibly surprise me attitude. In fact, he'd commented to Mario, his bartender, just that afternoon that frankly he was all out of surprise when it came to the customers walking through his door. Of all people he really should have known that making a statement like that was just asking Fate to come and prove you wrong.
It had been a typical day so far. All of the deliveries arrived on time. A couple of the regulars were waiting right outside the door when they opened at 7pm followed by a slow but steady trickle of other customers behind them. He was in the middle of explaining to Freddy the Guppy, don't ask why it was Guppy instead of Fish, it was a long involved highly embarrassing story that even embarrassed Lorne and he hadn't been involved in it in any way, shape or form. The point was, he was explaining for the third time that week no matter what Freddy did he was going to be belly up by Sunday and no, Lorne wouldn't open a tab for him when three humans and a not quite human, but definitely not a demon walked in and sat down at a table. Granted, even if he hadn't been arguing with Freddy, Lorne probably wouldn't have paid much attention to them anyway other than a glance at tall, dark, and not-a-human. Three guys and a woman, all human-looking, just wasn't a big blip on his radar. Most of the club patrons paid them little attention either other than to remark on the gold tattoo of a snake on tall, dark, and not-a-human's forehead. General consensus was, oww.
The older of the three men, light brown hair starting to go gray, ordered the first round of drinks: two beers, a margarita, and "Sex On The Beach for my buddy, T, here." 'T' merely raised an eyebrow at the drink selection.
Suffice it to say, there was little about this group in particular to draw Lorne's attention. Even when they started to discuss possible songs to sing. No, Lorne might have gone his whole night without paying them any attention if it wasn't for the fifth member of their party who joined them when he was in his office for a minute. One moment the space by their table was empty, the next minute there was a brief flash of light and then what appeared to be a small Roswell Gray alien standing there. Pretty much the collective jaw of the club was on the ground. A few patrons didn't have jaws to drop but if they did they would have hit the floor too.
"I have been looking for you, O'Neill. General Hammond informed me that you might be here and I see that he was correct." The Roswell Gray looked around in interest. "What is this place, O'Neill? The other patrons are quite colorfully dressed. O'Neill shrugged his shoulders.
"It's a karaoke bar, Thor, buddy."
"What is a carry-okie bar?"
"Well, people come here to drink a lot and then once they're plastered they get up on stage and sing. It can be a very liberating experience," O'Neill explained when his other two companions choked on their drinks.
"Interesting. What do people sing when they are...plastered?"
"Anything they want. You just pick a song and away you go."
"Where does one choose a song from?"
"There's a big book of songs over by the stage or you just announce what you plan to sing." O'Neill let out a smirk that had the others all worried. "If you're thinking of giving it a go, Thor, I know the perfect song for you. C'mon, I'll walk up with you if want to go next.
"Thank you, O'Neill."
"No problem." The two walked up to the stage together, Thor barely coming up to O'Neill's waist. At the stage O'Neill whispered something to Thor before returning to his seat. A moment later the vampire on stage finished up his rendition of Save The Last Dance For Me, walking off to a round of bright applause. Thor walked out, picking up the microphone. He tapped it a couple of times with a long thin finger before speaking.
"I am Thor, Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet and I shall be singing Wild Thing."
Lorne, standing next to the bar, paused with his drink halfway to his mouth. He blinked once, twice, three times and that still didn't change what he was seeing. Up on his stage was a child-sized Roswell Gray alien, naked, singing a somewhat credible rendition of The Trogg's Wild Thing. Lorne blinked again. Was he...? Yes, the little guy was actually bouncing along to the beat.
Never ever again was Lorne going to make the mistake of claiming that he had, in fact, seen all there was to see.
Finis
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Stargate SG-1 or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. All rights belong to their owners and I merely borrow the characters for your amusement.
After almost five years of running Caritas, Lorne had developed something of a blase, seen it all, nothing could possibly surprise me attitude. In fact, he'd commented to Mario, his bartender, just that afternoon that frankly he was all out of surprise when it came to the customers walking through his door. Of all people he really should have known that making a statement like that was just asking Fate to come and prove you wrong.
It had been a typical day so far. All of the deliveries arrived on time. A couple of the regulars were waiting right outside the door when they opened at 7pm followed by a slow but steady trickle of other customers behind them. He was in the middle of explaining to Freddy the Guppy, don't ask why it was Guppy instead of Fish, it was a long involved highly embarrassing story that even embarrassed Lorne and he hadn't been involved in it in any way, shape or form. The point was, he was explaining for the third time that week no matter what Freddy did he was going to be belly up by Sunday and no, Lorne wouldn't open a tab for him when three humans and a not quite human, but definitely not a demon walked in and sat down at a table. Granted, even if he hadn't been arguing with Freddy, Lorne probably wouldn't have paid much attention to them anyway other than a glance at tall, dark, and not-a-human. Three guys and a woman, all human-looking, just wasn't a big blip on his radar. Most of the club patrons paid them little attention either other than to remark on the gold tattoo of a snake on tall, dark, and not-a-human's forehead. General consensus was, oww.
The older of the three men, light brown hair starting to go gray, ordered the first round of drinks: two beers, a margarita, and "Sex On The Beach for my buddy, T, here." 'T' merely raised an eyebrow at the drink selection.
Suffice it to say, there was little about this group in particular to draw Lorne's attention. Even when they started to discuss possible songs to sing. No, Lorne might have gone his whole night without paying them any attention if it wasn't for the fifth member of their party who joined them when he was in his office for a minute. One moment the space by their table was empty, the next minute there was a brief flash of light and then what appeared to be a small Roswell Gray alien standing there. Pretty much the collective jaw of the club was on the ground. A few patrons didn't have jaws to drop but if they did they would have hit the floor too.
"I have been looking for you, O'Neill. General Hammond informed me that you might be here and I see that he was correct." The Roswell Gray looked around in interest. "What is this place, O'Neill? The other patrons are quite colorfully dressed. O'Neill shrugged his shoulders.
"It's a karaoke bar, Thor, buddy."
"What is a carry-okie bar?"
"Well, people come here to drink a lot and then once they're plastered they get up on stage and sing. It can be a very liberating experience," O'Neill explained when his other two companions choked on their drinks.
"Interesting. What do people sing when they are...plastered?"
"Anything they want. You just pick a song and away you go."
"Where does one choose a song from?"
"There's a big book of songs over by the stage or you just announce what you plan to sing." O'Neill let out a smirk that had the others all worried. "If you're thinking of giving it a go, Thor, I know the perfect song for you. C'mon, I'll walk up with you if want to go next.
"Thank you, O'Neill."
"No problem." The two walked up to the stage together, Thor barely coming up to O'Neill's waist. At the stage O'Neill whispered something to Thor before returning to his seat. A moment later the vampire on stage finished up his rendition of Save The Last Dance For Me, walking off to a round of bright applause. Thor walked out, picking up the microphone. He tapped it a couple of times with a long thin finger before speaking.
"I am Thor, Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet and I shall be singing Wild Thing."
Lorne, standing next to the bar, paused with his drink halfway to his mouth. He blinked once, twice, three times and that still didn't change what he was seeing. Up on his stage was a child-sized Roswell Gray alien, naked, singing a somewhat credible rendition of The Trogg's Wild Thing. Lorne blinked again. Was he...? Yes, the little guy was actually bouncing along to the beat.
Never ever again was Lorne going to make the mistake of claiming that he had, in fact, seen all there was to see.
Finis
